Nothing to live for

I lost everything

Everything that gave me hope

To live

I don’t really know how

I knew I was broken

Didn’t know I was toxic

Didn’t know I didn’t deserve

Anything good in life

Lost everything

Everything to live for

I have no hope now

No shred of happiness

Apparently, I am

Beyond salvation

I don’t know

What sins I did

In my past life

To deserve

So much of pain

God’s telling me

That I deserve

To be broken

Again

And again

And again

Do I deserve so much of pain?

Yes, it does seem so

But I don’t know why

I am destined to be

Alone

And I know

I’ll die alone

I am meant

To stay broken

I want to scream

I want to ask why

I don’t complain

I won’t complain

Just tell me why

Why so much of pain

What have I done

Why am I even living?

Just a source of some

Screwed up form of fun?

Entertainment from some

Perverted perspective?

Why shouldn’t I

Destroy myself to death?

I am tired,

Tired of this

Tired of everything

I really have

Nothing to live for

Anymore

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